Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside


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Autism Bucks Workshop – Autism As A Fruit Salad

This second workshop is an expansion of autisms using Donna William’s “fruit salad” analogy as the basis. I shall be adding links to expanding on some of the aspects which I spoke about.

Further Reading and Links

Autism & Social Emotional Agnosia

Autism & Alexithymia

Autism & Simultagnosia

Autism & Faceblindness

Autism & Auto-immune Disorders

Autism & Genetic Syndromes

Autism & Dietary Disabilities

Autism & Language Processing Disorders

Autism & Communication Disorders

Autism & Dyspraxia

Autism & Self and Other Integration & System of Sensing

Paul Isaacs 2020


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“Autistic” Identity & Sense of Self?

My autism dances with my personhood… and my personhood must also dance with my autism yet whilst not separable, nor are they interchangeable with each other.

Autism, Identity First Language, and Identity Blog 2014

Donna Williams

What is “Autistic Identity” is this narrative helpful? Or is its own simplicity, stereotypes, static and linear narrative actually causing more harm than good? Are people who do not fit the “look” being dismissed because of politics and hidden agendas?
 
Personality Types & Disorders in Autism
 
For example let’s look at personality types and autism – all humans beings have these mine are mercurial, idiosyncratic, serious, self-sacrificing and solitary this tempers my perspective, tolerance, outlooks and even my belief systems to some degree. When they become disordered this in term has an impact on presentation.
 
Social Perceptional Challenges 
 
Now there is sensory perception social emotional agnosia (not seeing body language, facial expression and tone of voice) and alexithymia (emotional awareness) is not SENSORY perception but SOCIAL perception.
 
Sensory Perception and Sensory Integration? Different Origins?
 
SENSORY perception simultagnosia, semantic agnosia and associated visual agnosias in which the person struggles with context, faces, people, visual mentalising and secondary factors with language processing what about that reality? Sensory sensitivities associated with psychosomatic amplification are different.
 
Language Processing, Perception & Articulation 
 
Then there is in language processing such as verbal agnosia the perception of words, receptive and expressive aphasia and ability to filter interpretation, sentence structure and may have secondary communication disorders such as body and oral apraxia. What about that reality?
 
Mental Health – Does This Change Presentation?
 
What about people who have mental health presentations such as dissociative disorders, attachment disorders, psychosis, anxiety disorders and impulse control disorder. What about that reality?
 
What About People With Impacted Health Systems?
 
What about people with gut, autoimmune, metabolic or collagen disorders in which they gave associated challenges around these conditions in top of any further information processing challenges above? What about that reality?
 
Autism “Politics” & Fixed Narratives 
 
What about people whom claim that people aren’t on he spectrum due to personal and potentially mitigated circumstances? An inability to see their reality, ideas or perspectives? So potentially setting up an assassination of character and allowing others to go along for ride? How is that care, compassion or inclusion?
 
I would like to further add that if someone whom was diagnosed in the 1960’s with “childhood psychosis” (which is what they thought autism back then) and later had been diagnosed with autism in the 1990’s along with other conditions throughout their adulthood (such as visual perceptual disorders, atypical epilepsy, dietary disabilities, malabsorption, collagen disorders/ehlers danlos syndrome), whom for many years their diagnosis was considered to be “fake” and a “fraud” despite historical evidence. Is that correct?
 
Is it fair that their character after over two decades of physical and sexual abuse (they had a mother whom was a attachment disordered serial pedophile and abuser) whom acquired PTSD and Dissociative Identity Disorder to be given the mantle of “fake”? Personality disordered? Emotionally dysregulated? Violent and infantile? I ask these questions because its certainly clear to me that it isn’t and yesterday it brought me great sadness because I know in my heart that this isn’t truth. Its not the writer of such things I upset by its the teller of those things. 
 
They are not here to defend themselves so the least I can do is send out a clear message do not dictate someone’s character second hand. Its that simple.
 
Identity vs. Reality 
 
“Autistic Identity” is a it’s own separate social phenomena in which people can at times cherry pick what “is and isn’t” their autism. One can supply facts with empathy and I have always remained objective and moderate in the world of autism. Let’s start acknowledging that “autism” was never one thing in the first place.

When someone is diagnosed with autism? Are there other aspects we have to consider?


So for example if someone sees there whole being as “Autistic” is that accurate? helpful? Should we be allowing this to happen?

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Autism Bucks – What is Autism? Workshop

What is Autism? – Autism Bucks & Paul Isaacs

This workshop is an an introduction and overview of autism using Donna William’s “fruit salad” analogy as the basis. I shall be adding links to expanding on some of the aspects which I spoke about.

Autism “Fruit Salad” Expanded

Autism and Personality Types

Autism and Personality Types? Why Aren’t They Looked Into?

Autism, Personality & Identity

Ptypes website

Autism and Visual Perception

Autism, Visual Agnosias And Making Connections

Agnosia, Sensory Perception & Autism

Autism and Exposure Anxiety

Exposure Anxiety & Autism

A Diagnostic Criteria For Exposure Anxiety?

Further Links

What is Autism?

Differences Between Aspergers & Autism “Fruit Salads?”

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Donna Williams – Autism Beyond The Narrative

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It’s a very lonely road at times with my autism work and advocacy and here is why, I know as I type things will make more clarity as I continue to type.

Since Donna Williams’ passing in 2017 I have tried to advocate for her fruit salad analogy of autism (please checkout previous posts, links and images etc). I know that over her years of advocacy and consultancy she had her fair share of problems and challenges.

Militant autism advocates (on and off the autism spectrum) attacking her online for daring to challenge the status quo, rhetoric and internalised problems within the autism community.

Misunderstandings in her non- soft language terminology and her ability to supply “what if” scenarios etc.

This can a does become tiring on both a mental and physical level as to supply knowledge, it isn’t always easy however I try various different formats and medias to do so.

I believe that the ethical and moral thing to do is to supply with empathy and candour the multi-faceted nature of autism, the presentations, the mechanics and personhood.

Why? Because empowerment in this context means giving people tools to make good in life, to find themselves and be ultimately the best version of themselves. So many people cherry pick what autism “is and isn’t” and that is completely understandable because knowledge is not on the table to be supplied.

So anybody interested in finding out more?

Take time in ingest the knowledge and please know as with Polly my heart is in the right place.

Thank you Paul 😉👍 2020


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Living With Residual Exposure Anxiety

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Note this is from a personal perspective on Exposure Anxiety 

I have written about Exposure Anxiety for many years, some people do not know they have this condition, some people they come out of it, for others they live in the invisible cage both in a prison and in sanctuary, hiding and residing in faux comfort and fear.

For some it is the involuntary compulsive, involuntary and self-protective responses that render the person sabotaging social situations when “self” has been aware of.

It’s pre-conscious act in which the person cannot control the nervous-system’s knee jerk reaction.

Although I still have a residual presentation of EA. I have come a long way, through self education, self awareness and self-advocacy. 😊👍

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Self-Awareness & Balance – How Invisible Foundations Impact On Self

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Failure are friends, mistakes are mountains climbed, errors are conversations of change

I have learnt the more grounded you are the journey to this frame of mindscapes becomes clearer and more opaque. Take ownership of yourself, your life, your autonomy.

Before people tell you who you are, think of who you are and assume you are, make sure you have a healthy foundation of self-awareness.

It helped me over the years deal and manage other people’s projection. A lot of people who project have low self confidence, self-esteem for a multitude of differing reasons, personality disorders, anxiety, mood, attachment and/or dissociative disorders.

Poor parental and environmental underpinnings can then cause a fracture sense of core beliefs which then in turn cause a dissonance between actual (perceived) and real self, not many know who they are and project what they think they should be. The  gnarled backbone of unhappiness.

So in many ways I feel empathy for people whom are angry at the world and at its perceived and very real misgivings.

However boundaries have to be out in place listen not always to the words but the patterns in which the words form. I have learnt that distance and cutting off is a very needed and that is fine.

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Doing It Your Way – A Long Road to Autism & Self Care Skills

IMAG1230

Haha love this blog about autism and splinter skills and were one skill set can baffle and be up for contradiction in another.

Bathing, Temperature & No Sense of Time or Body 

It took me until sixteen onwards to understand the concept of bathing as a tool to wash your body in prior to this I would urinate in the bath, smear bubble bath liquid  on the tiles along with shaving foam.

A lot of times bathing the water would be too hot, too deep and would cause me to get light headed. I would sometimes lay in the bath for hours (until the water was cold), get lost dissociate, disconnect and focus on a fixed point and/or using the bath products.

The Art Of Toothbrushing

Tooth brushing I have yet to master, I have bouts of mild gingivitis, and a recent salivary gland infection which has “switched off” my left salivary gland. (I lose the patterns of how to brush my teeth for how long, the amount of pressure etc.) Dentists kindly remind me each time of how to do it.

The Delicacy of Shaving

Shaving my face I find odd too most of the hair density is below my jaw line, as such I am still so disconnected from body (so again losing patterns, strategies, movement and motion.) Leaving me with a blotchy and blood ridden skin at times.

Toilet Trouble 

Toileting is a lot about were my body is in relation to the toilet and pan, knowing the internal reasonings, feelings and sensations that go with it. This is secondary to shy bladder and bowel syndrome.

Mop Maintenance 

Hair brushing is a trial I have long thick curly hair and I have days and moments in which struggle  to obtain and use right brushes and the stratagems to untangle.

Learning, Context & Conclusion 

Context and meaning blindness, the inability to visually mentalise, visual perception, motion perception and body agnosias mean I rely on placement, position and associated contexts.

I suppose I did it my way.😉👍

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Autism The Personhood Acknowledged

Humility, Humanity, and Rhetorics

Laura Corker thank you for sharing sadly this treatment very common (common does not mean right, moral, acceptable) and nor should time be used as a reason or excuse.

Historical Accounts


This open, honest and saddening blog I feel helps explain my reasonings, for it is when people are reduced to being seen as one thing that the wheels of injustice begin to turn.

Autism, Identity and Historical Underpinnings

Frames of reference change from centuries to decades etc. People wonder why as person on the autism spectrum why I want to be seen as a person first and foremost.

To seen as a person, to be seen as a human being, to have healthy acknowledgment of one’s abilities and disabilities.

Conclusion

If we strip militancy and autism politics then I feel more realities will be touched with the depthful knowledge of shared realities.

Echoed within the eternal halls of telling that the mind scriptures do not become dust but are laid bare for futures to come.

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Rapists, Molesters & Sexual Abusers

See the source image

 

Manipulation Of Facts & Events

Some people whom commit sexual abuse on other people which includes rape, sadly may project innocence to the point in which they believe their own story and present it to the world.

Molestation and touching without consent is also not only a breach of trust, it’s a selfish, egotistical and narcissistic, it’s putting a person’s needs before another.

“Normalisation” Of Events 

The fallout for the victim could well be forced “normalisation” of the event, through false apologies, gaslighting and manipulation of the facts.

An overall disregard for the emotional impact by the predator will no doubt have an impact on the victim.

Mental Health Conditions Related to Sexual Abuse

Dissociation, PTSD, detachment from sexual organs and an unhealthy distortions in identity, sexuality, gender, intercourse and masturbation will have lingering and serious consequences.

So of course a predators nature should be accounted for, however the catch 22 will be if they are willing to admit to themselves what they have done.

Boundaries Are Needed

I have a personal peeve with people who disrespect other people’s bodies, a body should be touched only when their is a connected agreement between both parties. If there isn’t one must stop, if it continues then that is breaking boundaries, trust and seeing the person as a lust is not true connection.

Paul Isaacs 2020


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White Privilege Is A Fact Not A Fiction

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Definition Of White Privilege

Accepting white privilege is not enough, acknowledging it is not enough, saying racism happens with indifference and apathy is not enough.

the fact of people with white skin having advantages in society that other people do not have:
Jane Elliot On Making People Aware Of Racism 

Apathy, Indifference & Ignorance

Acts of apathy and indifference is compounding the problem can imagine being told your reality was not “real”? Or that your reality was something that “just happened” and was met with almost chronic indifference from a social and systematic perspective?

The British Empire Was Driven By Racist Ideology

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White privilege is happening and it’s warped hierarchy has been happening for well over 400 years, when the British Empire stole land, resettled and uprooted the gears of this machine did start to turn.

It is irresponsible and insufficient to view the separation of family units in the Caribbean through a lens that ignores the massive legacy of slavery – which is how most those families came to live there in the first place – and its relationship with the Commonwealth.

Kemi Alemoru – It’s Time Britain Confronted It’s Racist & Oppresive Past, No Half-Truths Blog 2018

Changing Facts To Fit Narratives? 

It’s seeped into our “British Culture” as “normal”, in education, in employment, in media, in books and in movies etc.

“Before, people had to hide their racism. If you felt something bad about about black people, about Muslims, you had to shut up. Now these people have the confidence to come out in public to say everything. This is scary to me, that scares the shit out of me.”

Stormzy – Musician – The Guardian Article 2019 UK is ‘definitely racist’ an 

It’s time for white people to know what is happening from the other side, not just acknowledge as a point of interest

No person’s reality should traded as insignificant to another’s.

Paul Isaacs 2020