Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside


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Autism, “Stored Responses”, Language, Processing Delay & Unconscious Thought

Language Processing Delay 2017

Note This from a personal perspective 

Conscious and Unconscious Processing 

The problem even though I have progressed in many areas is switching between conscious and unconscious patterns of thinking, this in term has an impact on my ability to keep with incoming information in this case verbal, the ability to think consciously about what how to answer and also gauge the emotional significance of it.

“Stored Responses” & Unknown Knowing

I have come to realise that have rapporteur of “stored verbal responses” which come out at moments when I cannot process information in real-time these can look sometimes stilted, disinterested or “vacant” this is because I have level of social-emotional agnosia due to visual perceptual disorders and receptive/expressive language disorders as a result of aphasia.  This jutting between a conscious response and conscious acknowledgment  when most of my thought process’ that are “connected” in unconscious states means I now looking at ways of trying to marry my thoughts in a more connected manner this comes through typing in which the information I type hasn’t consciously gone in and unconsciously comes out as Donna puts comes as a surprise to the person in question as it may do to the people around them.

“Being” and “Sensing”

Donna Williams explains how the senses of a person with autism work, suggesting that they are ‘stuck’ at an early development stage common to everyone. She calls this the system of sensing, claiming that most people move on to the system of interpretation which enables them to make sense of the world. In doing so, as well as gaining the means of coping with the world, they lose various abilities which people with autism retain.

I can exist in state of being for hours on end that is were my process’s lie I observe without a conscious “knowing” or “interpretation” of what is going on around me as the however on an introspective level it is being so. I connect far more broadly and deeply through touch and texture. I am primarily a kinesthetic thinker/processor.

Being A Silent Observer

I have observed the world “silently” however I wasn’t really “silent” in the literal sense speech was not only delayed but late to be functionally meaningful, words swilled in my mind however grasping them for context and meaning was a struggle to say the least as I grew into later infanthood my verbal speech impinged on my jutting my conscious thought with “sounds” that did not represent the “inner world” I resided in.  I am solitary and idiosyncratic and that has no doubt coloured my perceptions as much as the other part of my “autism fruit salad”.

Paul Isaacs 2017

 

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Book Review Autism Decoded: The Cracks in the Code: Volume 1 By Stella Waterhouse

 

This books is a must read for parents, professionals and people on the autism spectrum 

Stella Waterhouse has been a professional in the field of autism since the 1970’s with a whole wealth information that taps into the very soul with resonance and deep thought, she clear has a passion for getting the knowledge out there by presenting different aspects in chapters with detailed and accessible writing.

From detailed historical elements of autism, professionals and advocates on the autism spectrum  written with eager candor, emotion and objectivity to the multi-faceted nature of autism broken  down into accessible  pieces.

  • Sensory Perceptual Disorders
  • Sensory Processing
  • Theory of Mind
  • Context Blindness
  • Language Processing
  • Exposure Anxiety 
  • Alexithymia
  • Personality Types
  • OCD, ADHD and other co-conditions
  • Short/Long Term Memory
  • System of “Sensing”
  • Facilitated Communication 
  • Left-Right Brain Functions & Brain Development 
  • Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome 
  • Savantism

The running theme in book contextual to the information based on the specific chapter is to give a human element that touches the reader, makes them think, reflect, perspective take, feel emotion and more.(with first person account and historical accounts).Woven with relative and  factual elements (such as the brain and nervous system) that broaden the palette and overall sphere of information giving rounded, objective and fluidity the runs from page to page.

This is a refreshing book that achieves the very title it was given looking beyond the stale and liner 2D nature of autism and opening up a broadening 3D perspective that will no doubt help generations to come. Highly recommended.

Paul Isaacs 2017

 


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“Idiosyncratic Language” & “Stored Language Responses” in Autism

Interpreative Languuage 2017 2.png

Note this is from a personal perspective

Sometimes language in terms of interpretation can be difficult to “use” and “explore” however it may not be a true representation of the “inner world” the person is living in.

Words could come out stilted, mixed up and not in order and if the order is there it may take a lot time to form and lead into a strand of information. When my language was in its earliest “fruits” it was mixture of echolalia which I got from movies, sounds, movements, pitches and dominated my mind but trying to learn “interpretive language” was  “forced” and came from a  “stilted “place”.

  • Give the person time to process the information if the person has a level of Aphasia, and/or Verbal Agnosia
  • Allow time if the person has a level of motor coordination issues such as Oral Apraxia, Body Apraxia and/or Body Agnosias
  • Try using Gesture, Tone, Inflection and Objects of Reference
  • Understand were the stored language is coming from – Exposure Anxiety, Problems with Integration “self and other” in conversation, Body Related “Highs”, Mood, Anxiety, Impulse Control, Selective Mutism and/or Emotional Regulation 
  • See the Person First and Presume Competence

Before functional speech it a swill of verbal and visual information that I could not grasp nor mentalising in a fashion which was tangible my “inner world” was very much there but is was struggle to get it out I didn’t have a lot words to use in my mind as it was endlessly swirling and as I got older (before my later infant years) I was slowly building a firm repertoire of words and has a lot I want to say but couldn’t.

When functional speech came at the around the ages 7/8 the it was expressively of a three year old (in developmental, content and constructional presentation) however this “voice” that seemed to be more “fluid” scared me and frustrated me at the same time as it still didn’t represent my “inner world” I was torn between complex stored responses the basics of “interpretive speech” and wanting to cut off from verbal speech altogether not being able to “hold” mental images of words also delay many aspect of my language but painting and drawing in many ways we’re a creative and communicative effort it created a bridge.

I certainly did not have a Asperger trajectory when it came to expressive and receptive language and getting the point of verbal and contextual significance so when I get tired and my language processing goes down. 

  • Speech will become slower and fragmented
  • I will have consciously find “interpretive speak” words
  • Sentence construction and word placement will be mixed
  • I will get “stuck” on a word and/or sentence focusing on how it sounds

I still type more words than I verbally “speak” however I am grateful that I can and I try and use it to the best of my efforts in fact typing has allowed me to express my emotions with much more clarity, cadence and deepness.

Paul Isaacs 2017


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Autism, Words, Aphasia, Body & Visual Agnosias

Sound Asleep

Note this is from a personal perspective

Aphasia and Words

Words in my mind felt ethereal, transient and distant the internal garbel of sounds, pitches, tones, hums and inflection as if my unconscious mind was trying so desperately to find the words, string the sentences anew to project and receive in “real-time” on some level I believe in my later years that is what I was trying to do. The jumble of a “salad of letters” in my mind could be found and then lost in equal measure.

Oral Apraxia and Word Finding and Formation

The functional element of my speech was delayed in both speech and language the aphasia was both receptive and expressive in nature with a high instance of anomia (word finding). The other element is oral apraxia which rendered me unable to form the words I would find leaving me disconnected and frustrated.

Receptive Aphasia, Body Agnosia & Associated Visual Agnosias

The receptive element of speech for example someone talking to me was the same external garbel as was in my mind a silent war between expresser and receiver trying to find clarity amongst the hidden mist of miscommunication.  The inability to perceive my own body meant a level of internal groundedness was  not their and context was missed time and time again. I relied on the touch, taste, smell, texture these feelings gave me a context to grab onto and create an association it is no surprise to me that my Mum through I was deaf and blind because that is exactly how I was behaving my language processing and sensory perceptual systems (visual agnosias) were so scrambled the credible and most importantly meaningful option was to “feel to think”, “feel to relate”, “feel to connect”, “feel to be”, “feel to extract” and the list goes on.

Creating My Own Language

Before interpretative language sets one could be creating their own language through association, things they have heard and seen on the television, jingles on the radio or other stands of information that bears relevance to an event and/or emotional meaningful response. In my case this was form of communication which looked meaningLESS to the listener but was meaningFUL to me as the expresser.

Memory and Internal Mentalising 

A memory with no associative images for words and no words for images meant my style of learning and integrating was not logical in nature nor literal this is secondary reason why my language and visual-verbal processing was delayed and slower, however as the years progressed I was building up a slow repertoire to words and my functional speech came around 7/8 years old this was expressively and developmentally in terms of content and formation of a 3 year old this new “voice” at times rendered me equally mute and frustrated.

Conclusion

Looking at the broader instance of different aspects that make up language processing difficulties in autism one needs to look at what is making the difficulties piece by piece, how that has an impact on the person and then work on positive and empowering and meaningful interventions.

Paul Isaacs 2017


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Speech & Language Processing -The Words Within Myself & How Precious Words Are

Me Holding Something 2OVERVIEW

This is a personal overview of my Autism “Fruit Salad”

For the first 5 years of my life I was functionally non-verbal (internal jumbles of sounds with words within myself but unable to come out) and there was a massive disconnect, words were sounds, sounds had no origin, language was internally and externally jumbled so I had no language with meaning in my head, people were fragmented blobs making “noises” to each other, when I had budding moments of connectivity I lost them due to a mouth and tongue not coordinating. Of course the capacity for words was within me  and words were within me but sensory perceptual issues and coordination issues played their part in this. 

I did begin to piece things together I was aware of what others were saying about me in the playground at primary school for example, this is documented in my first book Living Through The Haze.

Parts of my Fruit Salad played apart in this such as

  • Simultagnosia – seeing things in bits and pieces, losing “wholes” and “connecting dots things where all fragmented.
  • Semantic Agnosia – I touched to perceive, to experience, to navigate, to sense, to connect, to understand my own self in relation to other and I also touched to communicate.
  • Aphasia – words where like sounds with no meaning, context or function other than it was a sound emitted from a fragmented blob as time progressed contextually words would come. and go however because of my outward behaviour I listened to some very ignorant things about myself without others connecting I was listening/processing.
  • Auditory Agnosia – I heard sounds and even now I wonder contextually where they come from sometimes sounds fill with wonder and confusion.
  • Visual-Verbal Agnosia – This along with Dyslexia made it hard for me to read with meaning and an understanding of what was on the page in front of me.
  • Oral Apraxia – One of the reasons I struggled to speak in the early years was the physically disconnect between my brain finding words and my body expressing them.
  • Echolalia/Echopraxia/Echomimia – These were used during my period of development where I was experimenting with words and movements and sounds – this was during the time I acquired functional speech 

More info on my webpage about speech and language processing 

Sensory ExplorerTV Shows

I loved Mighty Morphin Power Rangers and Hook my gate way to movement and language – when functional expressive speech came at 7/8 years old, it was developmentally that of a 3 year old I have to admit I was scared of this new language and wanted to go back but I kept moving forward. I still rely on the sensing system and at home I use this language still, I am glad that had parents that didn’t write me off. 🙂

All Profiles Are Different & Other Forms Of Communication

Please realise that all different profiles are different and please also be aware the people who do not speak through their mouths have a  human right to be able communicate, this is something I feel strongly about and something that should be embraced and acknowledged.

Paul Isaacs

Adult With Autism 2014  

 


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My Primary Language & Finding Balance With The Help Of My Parents

Mum and Dad 2005

Mum & Dad 2005

OVERVIEW

I’m thankful and grateful that my parents helped a guided me to be as functional as possible, not disabling further with martyrdom and co-dependency, teaching me right from wrong, understanding failure is normal, letting me experience the world and make progress and mistakes, encouraging happiness and balance and not seeing my a Autism as the sum total of my being – I’m a person, artist, poet and author – but like my parents also taught I am no better than anyone else.

My Language

Considering my primary speech/language is movements, sounds and echolalia and my internal language a jumble of noise and sounds (but words were trapped inside which I wanted to share), with no pictures, other people were fragmented blobs that made sounds to each other, I was functionally non -verbal for 5 years and when I gained functional speech at 7/8 years old the words inside came out scattered and wanted to go back but kept moving forward my primary language is still the above at home I revert back to that language that I hold so dear and you may not get much interpretive language out of me. I wish no pity of sorrow this is my own journey.

Interpretive Language & Pattern, Theme & Feel Language (D.Williams) 

Interpretive language is a second language to me which is English my primary language is movements, sounds, echolalia, licking, sniffing and tapping my surroundings, sounds and movements conveyed emotions, feelings and direction, sculpting faces, sniffing hair, flashing lights, things that spin, pretty textures, glowy things, sparkle, shine etc. At home my language would be hard for others to fathom.

Conclusion

I’m thankful that my parents have helped me in this way it is good to have and find balance in your life for a whole host of reasons – empowerment is one of key things that has helped me by not going down the road of victimhood  and also having a healthy acknowledgment of your actions on others.

Paul Isaacs

Adult with Autism 2014