Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside


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The Toxicity Of The Autism Community

Narcissistic Projection, Adornment Narratives & Superficial Behaviour

We are all up for judgement my advice to anyone whom makes assumptions come to the person first rather than creating a reality in your in mind in which you believe to be real. In certain facebook autism groups have become contrived, toxic, self-serving and unhealthy to be around.

Ownership and Respect

This goes beyond the remit of healthy disagreement or a basic acknowledgement of someone’s realities. If assumptions and projected realities which I do not stand for nor the lack ownership for one’s words or how they looked.

Faux Inclusivity & Confirmation Bias

If people wonder why the autism community is so broken, then maybe we should start taking a look at the conduct that militant advocates are taking in guise of help, empowerment and inclusivity?

True Inclusivity – It’s More About Others Than You

Is it inclusive to ignore people with dietary disabilities, gut, immune and metabolic disorders?

Is it inclusive to ignore fundamental basics neurology and/or biology?

Is it inclusive to see autism as everything about a person? Despite the three dimensional aspect of all human beings?

Is it inclusive to ignore people whom are functionally non-verbal?

Is it inclusive to use “neurotypical” (I prefer non-autistic) as a slur, put down or form of othering? Creating more division?

Is it inclusive to disregard one reality of autism because it doesn’t fit the status quo?

Is it inclusive to project and force a narrative onto someone without giving them the time or space to make up their own minds?

Is it inclusive to gossip, flame, swear and demonise people purely because they have a different reality to your narrative?

Is it inclusive to divide parents and children?

Is it inclusive that militant cultural and curist rhetoric (yes they have much more in common than not) gets more attention, air time and superficial interest than actually making a fundamental difference to people’s lives?

Be The Change You Want To See

I ask you is that healthy? Balanced? Overall what standards are we looking for? We as human beings should be the change and set examples not become bitter and ego driven.

Self Respect, Self Acknowledgment

Some people just take this playground mentality around with them. Sort your own stuff out first before you expect any meaningful change from anyone. I know my own self well enough to what happen was wrong regardless and I have at least have some self respect to know I am not deserving of it.

So politics are creating more fertile ground for these self serving agendas then with all due respect I want no part of it.

Paul Isaacs 2021


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“Autistic” Identity & Sense of Self?

My autism dances with my personhood… and my personhood must also dance with my autism yet whilst not separable, nor are they interchangeable with each other.

Autism, Identity First Language, and Identity Blog 2014

Donna Williams

What is “Autistic Identity” is this narrative helpful? Or is its own simplicity, stereotypes, static and linear narrative actually causing more harm than good? Are people who do not fit the “look” being dismissed because of politics and hidden agendas?
 
Personality Types & Disorders in Autism
 
For example let’s look at personality types and autism – all humans beings have these mine are mercurial, idiosyncratic, serious, self-sacrificing and solitary this tempers my perspective, tolerance, outlooks and even my belief systems to some degree. When they become disordered this in term has an impact on presentation.
 
Social Perceptional Challenges 
 
Now there is sensory perception social emotional agnosia (not seeing body language, facial expression and tone of voice) and alexithymia (emotional awareness) is not SENSORY perception but SOCIAL perception.
 
Sensory Perception and Sensory Integration? Different Origins?
 
SENSORY perception simultagnosia, semantic agnosia and associated visual agnosias in which the person struggles with context, faces, people, visual mentalising and secondary factors with language processing what about that reality? Sensory sensitivities associated with psychosomatic amplification are different.
 
Language Processing, Perception & Articulation 
 
Then there is in language processing such as verbal agnosia the perception of words, receptive and expressive aphasia and ability to filter interpretation, sentence structure and may have secondary communication disorders such as body and oral apraxia. What about that reality?
 
Mental Health – Does This Change Presentation?
 
What about people who have mental health presentations such as dissociative disorders, attachment disorders, psychosis, anxiety disorders and impulse control disorder. What about that reality?
 
What About People With Impacted Health Systems?
 
What about people with gut, autoimmune, metabolic or collagen disorders in which they gave associated challenges around these conditions in top of any further information processing challenges above? What about that reality?
 
Autism “Politics” & Fixed Narratives 
 
What about people whom claim that people aren’t on he spectrum due to personal and potentially mitigated circumstances? An inability to see their reality, ideas or perspectives? So potentially setting up an assassination of character and allowing others to go along for ride? How is that care, compassion or inclusion?
 
I would like to further add that if someone whom was diagnosed in the 1960’s with “childhood psychosis” (which is what they thought autism back then) and later had been diagnosed with autism in the 1990’s along with other conditions throughout their adulthood (such as visual perceptual disorders, atypical epilepsy, dietary disabilities, malabsorption, collagen disorders/ehlers danlos syndrome), whom for many years their diagnosis was considered to be “fake” and a “fraud” despite historical evidence. Is that correct?
 
Is it fair that their character after over two decades of physical and sexual abuse (they had a mother whom was a attachment disordered serial pedophile and abuser) whom acquired PTSD and Dissociative Identity Disorder to be given the mantle of “fake”? Personality disordered? Emotionally dysregulated? Violent and infantile? I ask these questions because its certainly clear to me that it isn’t and yesterday it brought me great sadness because I know in my heart that this isn’t truth. Its not the writer of such things I upset by its the teller of those things. 
 
They are not here to defend themselves so the least I can do is send out a clear message do not dictate someone’s character second hand. Its that simple.
 
Identity vs. Reality 
 
“Autistic Identity” is a it’s own separate social phenomena in which people can at times cherry pick what “is and isn’t” their autism. One can supply facts with empathy and I have always remained objective and moderate in the world of autism. Let’s start acknowledging that “autism” was never one thing in the first place.

When someone is diagnosed with autism? Are there other aspects we have to consider?


So for example if someone sees there whole being as “Autistic” is that accurate? helpful? Should we be allowing this to happen?

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Autism The Personhood Acknowledged

Humility, Humanity, and Rhetorics

Laura Corker thank you for sharing sadly this treatment very common (common does not mean right, moral, acceptable) and nor should time be used as a reason or excuse.

Historical Accounts


This open, honest and saddening blog I feel helps explain my reasonings, for it is when people are reduced to being seen as one thing that the wheels of injustice begin to turn.

Autism, Identity and Historical Underpinnings

Frames of reference change from centuries to decades etc. People wonder why as person on the autism spectrum why I want to be seen as a person first and foremost.

To seen as a person, to be seen as a human being, to have healthy acknowledgment of one’s abilities and disabilities.

Conclusion

If we strip militancy and autism politics then I feel more realities will be touched with the depthful knowledge of shared realities.

Echoed within the eternal halls of telling that the mind scriptures do not become dust but are laid bare for futures to come.

Paul Isaacs 2020


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Autism, Understanding True Love & Mergence Of Actual Self

See the source image

Note – This is from a personal perspective

Make Compassionate Comparisons 

What I have learnt today is a great lesson in the fact the brain can only take in a certain amount of information at a time, people have a unfortunate tendency to put a hierarchy on trauma, that one is worse, one is this more and other is less.

The truth is that devalues both parties to being just about the subject of comparisons, emotional detachment and spawning a level of guilt that person’s own trauma reactions is not compatible bases on the notion of “being less” therefore an inappropriate expression or reaction.

I have never believed that one’s life experiences should traded for another’s based on how someone should feel, nor do I agree with a person monopolising an experience to their own ends. It devalues both the experiences and realities of the subjects at hand.

Trauma & Rationality 

I have recently met all my traumas as realities in their own right, the emotional and sexual abuse at school, the emotional and psychological abuse at placements of employment, the death of my Grandparents and the illnesses that have almost killed my parents. They are experiences but not definitions of my overall character.

I take the learned experience of taking autonomy, objectivity and emotionality of all these events, understood them, internalised them as I was always myself and never sought projection as a game worth playing. I would never change a thing in my life as it has tempered my spirit, served valued lessons and kept me humble.

Detached Surface Responses

Superficiality it is like being presented a cake and realising beyond the icing there is nothing more than air underneath. I refused to play the ritualistic notion of “being a victim” as yet again it is a detachment from self not a synthesis of of the latter. False identity is just if not more taxing than not knowing who you are at all. Self respect is needed.

Self love is not selfishness, nor is empathy about other always putting your needs first, then a person must treat into the middle in which care for others and yourself should be of equal beauty.

Autism, Personhood & Identity 

With regards to my autism, I personally have never seen it as all of “me”, it is not omnipresent and nor would it make sense for it to be so. I say this not out of shame but out of balance.

So many other aspects of my life being woven into the interlinking quilt of personhood that makes “Paul” let’s at least see people being defined by more than one word.

Paul Isaacs 2020


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My World- Autism, Ethos & Humanity

I am pleased an eagerly proud to be working for a small autism organisation called My World and day centre for people on the autism spectrum. This summer it shall be four years of service to which I have contributed my consultancy work.

With people who have a narrow, conceited and reductive view of what autism “is” and how one is supposed to “act” and “behave” noting that it has “one look” so therefore “one approach and intervention” is wrong and that doesn’t happen here.

At My World all the caring and empathic staff are valued, open-minded and willing to learn this means that what is taken is a person-centred approach, looking at the person’s mental health, learning styles, information processing challenges and ultimately sees them as people or equal worth and value going about their day and purcuits.

Our success is our ethos, open-mind natures, ability to learn new things and approaches and empathy which encourages people in the end to be the best version of themselves.

Paul Isaacs 2019


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Autism & Identity

I have never seen all of my being as autistic because the word is an adjective a describing word of an experience.

Current Experiences

I experience face blindness, object blindness and meaning blindnessas I do a language processing disorder, hemiplegia, body agnosias and associated learning difficulties.

Past-Tense Experiences

There are also experiences in the past tense such as over coming oral apraxia, high levels of exposure anxiety, selective mutism and gaining functional speech although it was a long road to doing so.

Personality Types

I have personality types such as Mercurial, Idiosyncratic, Self-Sacrificing and Serious (all human beings have personality types of varying types).

Conclusion

Autism is not ALL it is PART OF I see myself as a person a patchwork quilt made of many things. Autism just “is” I am neither proud nor ashamed. I seek balance not objectification. 😊

Paul Isaacs 2019


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Autism & What About Humanity? And Connectivity?

Family Christmas Early 90s

Dad, Gramp & Me Just “Being”

Autism it just “is” when I go out in the world the biggest thing for me is to be apart of humanity, people, beings – so when I go down the street what do you “see” and what do.

I “see” – “Autism” is a name for a clustering of pre-existing conditions which I have which for me are (PERCEPTUAL, LANGUAGE EXPRESSION, AUDITORY, LANGUAGE RECEPTION, BRAIN INJURY, MOVEMENT, COGNITION) this is PERSONAL to me but they affect how I process things/understand things – they do not define my TOTALITY nor are they “ME” I am artistic, idiosyncratic, emotive, emotional, creative, solitary, serious, funny, silly etc those things are what is called shared things with other people (regardless of any disability or not).

Autism is something I am neither proud or nor ashamed of it just “is” I was born a person so I would rather people see me as a person (as everyone else should be) not to be swept up by stereotypes, or militancy or “them” and “us” perceptions, but be seen as person. I am not a an “object” to be observed nor am I a “genius” to be revered – so if we look at being balanced about things then we open up more doors then close them. I am no “better” nor “worse”. We (as human beings) are all equal. 

Paul Isaacs 2015


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Being Brain Damaged – Is Apart of my Autism Profile – A Word That Just “is”

Baby Fisted Hands

Baby picture – note fisted/clasped hands and pointed toes signs of brain injury.

Note – This is from a personal perspective of how autism affects me and my profile.

Brain Damage/Injury

Brain Damaged and/or brain injury is apart of the reason why I have autism and certain “pieces” of it would not have been there but this is due to circumstance and environment the difficult birth.

The placental abruption and oxygen deprivation that caused and stroke, left-right disorientation, visual perceptual disorders, language processing disorder (aphasia) and issues with internalising and externalising language and other developmental aspects.

A Human-Being – Everyone is Equal

I have no problem with seeing this a part of the issues I face nor do I have an issue with the terminology being used.

In the this world today words sometimes to have to be used as marker and my case this is maker of a clustering of symptoms that I have as a result of brain injury.

As I have stated in the title it just “is” and I am fine with this it doesn’t make me feel any more nor any less. I am “Paul” first (and to be honest always will be) everything else pales in the background of significance.

I have been dealt a set cards and I am going to use them to the best of my abilities. I am not a super-human, I am not the next generation of humanity, nor a super-being, I am not technical, logical or literal or “intellectual”. I am afraid I am just a person.

Autism is Person Centred – It isn’t the Complete Definition of the the Person

I would however I say that I am creative (like art, poetry, wordplay, soundplay, textures, patterns, colours and fashion) and idiosyncratic (I play to the own beat) , mercurial (I listen to my emotions) and solitary (I like moments of my own company).

All the other things are redundant to me in the bigger picture they apart of me they aren’t me.

I am just a person living life and that is really all. People can play with words all they want but sometimes it is better to get real if not for your sake then for others.

Paul Isaacs 2015


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Person First Language – Why It Is Of Value For Me

Premature 1

Why I am A Person With Autism

Born a person first a little human being

Little “Paul” is what people were seeing

As I grew my personhood shone. so freeing

Something that all people are being.

My Autism is apart of me it doesn’t define the whole

I want be seen as more a noble quest my ultimate goal

Not everything is about my “condition” that takes its toll

Open your eyes ever look deeper into my soul

I am an artist I like to draw – my quirky imagination sores

I am a poet I like to write – my words are given clarity and flight

My speech, vision and language are at times fragmented

But this doesn’t mean I am eternally demented

See the person, their eager smile be with them for but a while

Likes and dislikes, wants and the needs these are but human deeds

I want people with open eyes too see I know that path fills with glee

That it is one’s personhood that connects you and me

Paul Isaacs 2015


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Neurodiversity – Sometimes Things Have To Be Questioned

Dr Casanova

Dr Casanova

I have a lot of respect for Dr Manuel Casanova and this a very revealing blog about the subject of neurodiversity and what it means – it is my opinion that no one person can “represent” autism just because they themselves are on the autism spectrum.

I Can Only Speak About My Reality With Autism

I make professional and moral judgement to say this is my profile and that is the ONLY place it is coming from (I can’t speak for others on the spectrum) – I say “I” and “me” not “us” and “we” in speeches (again I cannot speak for everyone on the spectrum that doesn’t make sense).

I don’t believe autism is a “culture” either (I am apart of the human race) and I think we need think about what is projected and who is losing out? Is it people who don’t tow the line, fit the “stereotypes” are not seen as good advocates because of their “functioning”. I wonder? I know we all have a story to tell? But is it right for someone to tell their story on everyone else’s behalf?

Empowerment & Acknowledgment Of Multiple Realities Of Autism

Autism is a “Fruit Salad” it is not one thing, it isn’t one syndrome and it affects people in different ways so what Manuel is advocating is that the more realities we acknowledge and listen to the more understanding we have – their should be no single representation because the voices get lost, realities can form into assumptions and they are both dangerous and can make people feel isolated and alone in their struggles.

Autism As As “Fruit Salad” & Breaking Down “Stereotypes

Fruit Salad Analogy Copyright D.Williams

Fruit Salad Analogy Copyright D.Williams

As Donna Williams analogy points out “Autism” is not “one thing” it is a clustering of different pieces that create the person’s on unique profile and presentation that means that logically no one person is the same on the autism spectrum, therefore realities within autism are different and people on the spectrum are not all the same, nor do they have same needs, desires or aspirations. I will take that one step further and say if someone got up on stage and talked about “non-autistic syndrome” and made the assumption every one with this syndrome is the same we would be in big trouble.

The Whole Spectrum & Personhood

I am for one agree and for empowerment, inclusion, diversity but that must be inclusive to the whole spectrum of “Fruit Salads” and the realities within them and seeing someone’s personhood is very empowering.

People With Classic Autism and/or Learning Disabilities & People Who Are Functionally Non-Verbal (Who Are Empowered By Different Forms Of Expressing Words

Looking at the whole spectrum means looking at different profiles and presentations and the firm empowering inclusion of people with classic autism and/or learning disabilities and people who are functionally non-verbal. Sometimes I worry that people with these diagnosis’ (who are considered to have an “exotic” or “atypical” presentation) and profiles don’t get recognition or heard. They are competent folk who need support too and their realities should be explored and recognised. They deserve to have voice.

Parents Views

Parent’s views are very important too and explorations of different ways to empower, support and help their children is also needed.
Autism “Politics”

I stay neutral and balanced like I point towards being a moderate in my views on autism accepting the diverse, different realities and people’s stories and what their own personal experiences are (be that a parent, guardian, person on the spectrum etc) all are valid.

I have said before that I’m not a “curist” and I’m not an “ableist” but a “neutral” because I believe everyone has a story to tell without going to unhealthy extremes if we listened with our hearts we would learn about each others experiences.

Other Blogs On The Subject

Please Include Everyone On The Autism Spectrum, Listening Is Positive & No One Person Can Speak For Everyone On the Autism Spectrum

Listening & Hearing Everyone’s Views In The Autism”World”

Paul Isaacs 2015