Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside


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To Polly – A Friend – Thank You

 

To Polly A Friend

Words cannot plunder

The source of your wonder

A light in the bleak dark

Words that make their mark

A kindly soul with the gift to give

A balanced example of how to live

A humbling experience your facts and humour

Your words, pictures and  legacy will forever nearer and sooner

Empowerment 

What can I say? I often have wondered how to put into words how I feel about the impact that Polly has made on my life, the words, the support, the chuckles over our skype chats the personal and professional guidance that was given in the blink of an eye. She has helped broaden my professional career, empowered me to find myself and ultimately has given me invaluable tools.

Setting Examples 

The kindness and concern the building blocks shown by words and example and the insatiable zest for life and to “just be” in your own skin, to have fun, to be serious, to be balanced, to be caring, to be selfless, to be you, to understand me and other, to be giving and to be caring, to not put yourselves above and to finally find yourself and pave your own journey so you may have the tools to experience life anew. That is what I think when I will remember Polly a shining example of balance, breaking of barriers, retaining self, not selling out and creating her own path.

Connecting 

I meet Polly briefly in 2009 at a conference and connected with her on social media a few years later. I value her friendship because she showed me that relationships can be built on safe, secure and balanced foundations and to expect anything less is the time to move on and pave something new. I am fully aware people knew Polly far more than I did in terms of length of time and so forth. I would like to say that the impact she made on me and her continued friendship online put faith and self-belief back into a realistic and doable perspective.

I thank you Polly for giving me the tools to empower, for giving me hope, laughs, reality and solutions and just being you.

Nobody Nowhere – Paper Owl Films 

Paul Isaacs 2017

 

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Being Thankful For My Parents

Mum and Dad Early 80s

Please note this is from a personal perspective

It may sound like a cliche in many ways to create a blog with a title such as “Thankful for my parents”  but that is how I feel I know that many people may not for many reasons feel the same as me and that is fine.

I am thankful for them because they  have given me good boundaries, have treated me as a human being then growing up as an infant, teenager and now as an adult, they do not let my disability “define the whole package” (I have written many a blog about that subject), guided me to know that failure and being wrong is normal part of life, to accept and take responsibility for both positive and negative actions, to help people who need it, to always be truthful and be true to yourselves.

I value their sage wisdom as many of these “mantras” and “life skills” come from past mistakes and “failures” but as my parents have noted failures are the fruits of success and success comes in many different forms as example setters for us all.

Paul Isaacs 2016

 


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The Road To Being Assertive

OSAM_0588VERVIEW

Note – this is from a person perspective 

For many years my “normal” was disappear into the background, my views didn’t count and I thought even if they could be they wouldn’t be heard agreeing and disagreeing with folks because their opinions were so much more than mine.

DEVELOPMENT & PERSONALITY

I believe this was a mixture of developmental processing (alexithymia, aphasia) elements of mutism (not talking for long periods of time) and lacking the ability to be assertive in conversations and interactions and also being solitary and sensitive person by nature.

I’M NOT A DOORMAT

No one is a doormat and that was the problem that is what I was presenting myself as I want to help others and I’m caring and empathetic to other’s needs and emotions but the problem was the imbalance. That needed to be balanced many people over the years have “used” me in this way and then “dumped” once they have had their fix of support.

What has changed since being in the therapy is realising that the balance is needed between –

  • Having the  balance and equality – so that all others voices, views and opinions are being  heard
  • That disagreement is good and  positive it can be productive in conversations
  • That conversations aren’t about someone taking away from someone  but also giving something back in return
  • That saying how you really feel about something or someone matters and also those people expressing how they feel to (whatever their communication profile is)
  • That letting go of negative/unproductive relationships is sometimes needed for both parties

CONCLUSION

I’m no better than anyone else and never will be but no one should ever feel they’re less either, something I felt for many years getting the balance right has taught me so much and it is learning curve for any who has been treated in a similar way.

Hope springs eternal. 🙂

Paul Isaacs 2014


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Healthy Boundaries, Healthy Minds – Exploring Your Autism Profile IN A Balanced Way

Dr Who 1OVERSTEPPING BOUNDARIES &  OVER DEFINING

Cyberchondria (or cyberchondriasis) is the unfounded escalation of concerns about common symptomatology based on review of search results and literature online.Articles in popular media position cyberchondria anywhere from temporary neurotic excess to adjunct hypochondria. Cyberchondria is a growing concern among many healthcare practitioners as patients can now research any and all symptoms of a rare disease, illness or condition, and manifest a state of medical anxiety.

OVERVIEW & REMEMBER YOUR “YOUNESS”

Donna Williams is right remember Auties and Aspies to look for your profile “Fruit Salad” and understand it is one thing but to look for everything within everything and see yourself within that isn’t healthy – look at what relates to you explore it, maybe to help others and in turn help yourself but don’t let what you find out DEFINE you, it’s only apart of who you are not the WHOLE, which is so much more.  🙂 

Paul Isaacs  2014