Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside

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Autism and Asperger’s Different Trajectories and Different Presentations?


Today I was doing autism training and in the team was lovely and inquisitive man with Asperger’s Syndrome as the session went on he shared some of his experiences from not picking up verbal cues, being literal and having sensory integration disorder as well as issues with emotional regulation and possible alexithymia.

It amazes me still that people think that “Autism” and “Asperger’s Syndrome” are still considered to some to be the “same thing” when is clear that even if on the surface some of the issues may be similar many of underlying components are very different. If I use both the gentlemen in question and myself as examples so here goes.


  • The gentleman seemed to display a level of Social Emotional Agnosia which meant he struggles with non-verbal cues, tone of voice and facial expression he acknowledged that he use past experiences to build up a format of how to understand someone
  • He didn’t have Prosopagnosia (30% of people with social emotional agnosia do so)
  • He was literal in processing of verbal language and seemed to have less impaired visual-verbal processing
  • Possible Alexithymia which is “knowingness of your own emotional states”
  • Seemed to mentalise in a more logical, literal and pragmatic manner which suggests the use of the “left brain” person.

With Myself


  • I have a mixture of Simultagnosia (Object Blindness) and Semantic Agnosia (Meaning Blindness) which means my visual field is fragmented, distorted and incoming visual information does not have any meaning, context or reasoning
  • I have Prosopagnosia (Faceblindness) as an extending of the already existing issues around visual perception meaning I “recognise people” primarily by patterns of movement and voice
  • I have a level of Receptive and Expressive Aphasia (Meaning Deafness) which even in its current residual form means I “lose” the ability to keep up with interpretive verbal information and struggle with visual-verbal processing
  • I have less literal, logical and pragmatic style of thinking or organised thoughts  I am very much a “right brain” person.



I was asked what I thought the main different feature was between Autism and Asperger’s. I think you’ll maybe find in reading through the site on brain hemisphere specialisation that there are many Aspies who may be better at left brain stuff and many Auties who may be more right brain but not nearly recognised for the abilities they do have as much as they are recognised for the left-brain abilities they don’t have. Whilst most people have a balance of both abilities, being extremely one side or the other clearly means the abilities of that other side are far less practiced. Processing incoming information in a non-Autie manner usually involves using a good balance of the two. So feel free to try the test yourself.

Donna Williams

Related image


Different Trajectories 

Maybe its is because I spent large part of my infanthood exploring through my senses and/or through patterning, theming and feeling struggling to get a sense of what “interpretive information” is and what it means? To be around such information and how to connect all the dots within in my mind. However I appreciated and acknowledged the validity of it in my previous blog post.

I flourish in areas of typing, writing poetry and creativity I love wordplay, sounds,  pitches and the seemingly infinite kaleidoscope colours, shapes, textures and shines they “talk to me” as much as next person.

Things Foundly Remembered

I saw your face with my hands

A voice a distant echo but foundly acknowledged

The smell of the wise tree in the garden the leaves did dance

A new place everywhere to be eagerly explored upwards and onwards

Flomping along the globblyness unstuck and unshackled my hands are free

Looking at the gloaming and silvering shape what plotunes and envelopes my soul

I thank you old friends you are me and I am likewise swashing around in the ink clouds


Paul Isaacs 2017



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I am not a “Label” I am A Human Being First

Baby Pictures High ChairI don’t know about you but when I was born I was born a person, lets ditch the rhetorics and start listening to other peoples realities and opinions (regardless of were they come from) and accept that disagreement will come but everybody as their own things to say. Lets not be restricted by a “box” or the what is “in crowd” I thank the people who have said their realities with conviction, honesty, rawness and carrying on their lives as best they can be the example and don’t just claim it. I am not “autism” if doesn’t “define” my being it rides along life it not a “definition of my life”. I acknowledge those on  and off the spectrum who are honest about the realities lets start listening and going from there keep going even if you don’t do not feel listened to, no popular do not worry at the very least (or most you have been true you and have not be influenced by the dominant wave.) 

Fanciful fable a baby in a cradle
New life and new wonders able
A hand from “in crowd” does beckon
I walk in feel more lonely I reckon

I’m not those things you said “we” all are
I am not a part of a redundant single star
You say things as fact, straight lines so subjective
When all I want to be is “me” more reflective

A puppet on a string I cut them off and look around
The strings a still attached with words and the same sound
I got back to the “real world” so eagerly with open arms
It may not be perfect but honesty has its ethereal charms

I am part of the humanity no label defines me I shall deface
Of flesh and blood and gleefully I move from place to place
The words are rubbed away sounding through the sky
I now what I am from life to death a smile and a sigh

Paul Isaacs 2016

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In The Autism World It Is Always Best To Remember You Are A Person

Paul Big LegsI Am Sorry But I Must Say Something

The “culture” I was told that would support me
It doesn’t it has brought me sadness, it has made me shackled
It has not “set me free” I want to live a simple life
Where people are equal for that very reason with strife

Arguments a plunder my heart sinks and my nerves crack like thunder
As I feel my self esteem pulled down into the depths of the under
I ponder to myself what is it all about? Can’t people get along
Not one scream and not one shout, echoes all about

No more I say – I have given it my all I can be the person I was
His name was “Paul” and that is the some of it all
Hold hands and hearts and rejoice for we are not all one voice
But many are unsung, drowned out and ignored not the people’s choice

My heart fills with sunshine when I know that being here is no plight
Real friends and family give me my real joy, no more fights
A family member told me tenderly remember who you are that set me free
An onward path of freedom, hope and reflective clarity


Thank you to you all I have decided not to over-invest in the autism “culture” or politics anymore. I have stated my opinions and listened to others that is great . My view still is we are all human and can learn from each other and in the context of autism that still applies no one person is the same, no one person can speak for all, but one can talk about their reality and if it helps someone great and if it something you cannot relate too or don’t experiences equally great. 🙂

Paul Isaacs 2015

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Visions in La-La Land

Purple trees Dad and I Dancing
And orange sand
Sod off to logic
In this bizarre land

Waters made out marshmallow
Houses and abodes of peanut butter
Cars made out of bread
My heart and head s a flutter

Roads paved with jam
can you tell?
Pavements slithered with chocolate
Gob stoppers for a door bell

I wave about in laughter in joy
In land of dreams
I run up a stair case
Made of custard creams

Paul Isaacs 2014

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The Words Within Me

Me and Dad On Lap

Within the distant echoes of my mind
I try to grasp
I try to find
The inner most words
Within a fragmented mind

I’m searching
Like an explorer
On an epic journey
To the pastures of my inner voice
To open up and rejoice

For words are precious
However they’re formed
Different ways
With unique individual expression
To be eagerly adorned


Paul Isaacs 2014


Autism & Mythbusting – Challenging the Stereotypes  


So the post below about why I have Autism and a Learning Disability – What is that all about?  Mythbusting, demystifying and unrevealing the tired old stereotypes that still persist in the Autism world, were negative sometimes even militant memes exist and the “one voice for all” is hailed as king, no one can speak for everyone that is impossible but we can all help each other


The spectrum is so vast you have people who speak with their mouth and do or don’t have a Learning Disability you have people who speak and communicate in other ways that do or do not have Learning Disability. 


I thank people like

Donna Williams

Donna Williams Copyright D.Williams and C. Samuel

Donna Williams Copyright D.Williams and C. Samuel











Sydney Edmond

Copyright Sydney & Lisa Edmond

Sydney Edmond Copyright Sydney & Lisa Edmond














 Jennifer O’Toole

Jennifer O'Toole Copyright Asperkids

Jennifer O’Toole Copyright Asperkids












Rudy Simone

Rudy Simone 2 jpg









 Carly Fleischmann


Carly Fleischmann Copyright Carly & Arthur Fleischmann









Peyton Goddard 

Peyton Goddard

Peyton Goddard Copyright Peyton & Dianne Goddard















They all have very empowering messages for people with Autism and balance this out with seeing themselves as people with personalities and valued personhoods that they want to seen for but also want others to understand the diversity of Autism and it’s profiles – giving this back in balance is so needed – I am a person with Autism is far more liberating than saying Autistic Person. 


Paul Isaacs  2014 

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All Communication Is Valid – None Are Inferior


All people on the spectrum have a valid and functional ways of communicating and that is equally diverse in both receptive and expressive language – I find that I write more emotively than I verbally express and when I was a child who didn’t speak with my mouth for  5 years I HAD many words within me. 🙂



  1. Aphasia
  2. Verbal Auditory Agnosia
  3. Oral Apraxia 
  4. Mutism (once functional speech was gained)


The way in which I connected with people was through “sounds”, “movements” and “noises” which were functionally right for me it was my own language before interpretive language, I STILL live in this world and treat interpretive language as acquired but not my “native” language.


There are  amazing folks on the spectrum such as Carly Fleischmann, Sydney Edmond, Peyton Goddard who are showing their inner voices in beautiful and emotive ways that help us understand the different lives of people on the spectrum and also the shared personhood which they all have. 🙂

Remember all forms of communication are valid. 🙂

Paul Isaacs 2014