Paul Isaacs' Blog

Autism from the inside


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Living With Anomic Aphasia In The Context of Autism

paul-amber-2002-3Note that this is from a personal perspective 

Speaking to a speech and language therapist yesterday it got me thinking about my autism trajectory and what residual and very apparent markers of disability are still present and more importantly how they manifest and present themselves.

LOOKING BACK 

As a child it took me a long to time to speak and use language in a functional way this meant that both receptive and expressive language was hard to filter and decode into something that was connecting and meaningful.

LEFT HEMISPHERE & LANGUAGE

As I have stated in previous blogs part of my development was due to brain injury to the left hemisphere this part of brain is were human language is formed (although other aspects of the brain will connect with this).

THE PRESENTATION NOW 1  – VERBAL LANGUAGE 

As an adult  the type of a aphasia  (receptive and expressive) as apart of my autism would be considered residual in presentation and it effects me with I tired my words get stuck like a “blockage” and I have to consciously “find” the words which seem almost on “there” but disappear leaving me to have longer pauses or repeat “umm” for example.

THE PRESENTATION NOW 2  – VISUAL PERCEPTUAL DISORDERS & MENTALISING

Lacking visual internalisation means that I don not have a “meta-reality” which involves complex pictural referencing in other words I do not “store visual information in a coherent way” meaning that retrieval and word association when tired can be slowed down.

Having simultagnosia means I see things in pieces that has an effect on how I internalise visual information and mentalising (organising) and need to focus on movement, pattern and touch to externally map-out something rather than internally.

Anomic aphasia (also known as dysnomia, nominal aphasia, and amnesic aphasia) is a mild, fluent type of aphasia where an individual has word retrieval failures and cannot express the words they want to say (particularly nouns and verbs).[1] Anomia is a deficit of expressive language. The most pervasive deficit in the aphasias is anomia. Some level of anomia is seen in all of the aphasias.[2] Individuals with aphasia who display anomia can often describe an object in detail and maybe even use hand gestures to demonstrate how the object is used but cannot find the appropriate word to name the object. [3]

CONCLUSION THE PRESENTATION NOW 3  – ANOMIA (WORD FINDING)

It is completely understandable that not having an visual memory and having a long developmental history of language associated issues that word finding at times for me can be difficult but one much use what they have and accept what is going on. I’m glad I am in a position to understand what is going on and I hope this blog helps others who can relate to this. 🙂

Paul Isaacs 2017

 

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Not All People With Autism Are Logical Or Literal In Thought Or Presentation

20160730_102005 (2)Note This is from a personal perspective 

What Autism IS and ISN’T

Looking at the broaden the aspects of presentation in autism it is about understanding what autism is and just as importantly what it isn’t.

It isn’t is a generic stacking of black and white linear symptoms that present in every person in the same way, what it is is a stacking of conditions that are specific and personal to the individual.

The Hidden Strands Of Information

I can of course be logical that is natural human variant of thought and has nothing to do with autism (and also various personality types will overlap with overall presentation), however  I struggle with intense over a analytical  logical decoding of a situation as it is happening that leaves many things up in the air for me.

Such as emotional perception, (not knowing my bodies own reactions to the the incoming information) receptive and expressive language (word formation, extraction, relevance, understanding), lack of visual association (no pictures for words), information processing delays (incoming information not being “sorted” quickly enough to be “understood”).

Taking Things To Heart? 

As a child more prominently and now as adult the residual issues are still there such as not seeing the significance of what is being said this is before the literal. 

That means I am less likely to take things on a personal level even if I am being spoken too in a personal way.

I was asked what I thought the main different feature was between Autism and Asperger’s. I think you’ll maybe find in reading through the site on brain hemisphere specialisation that there are many Aspies who may be better at left brain stuff and many Auties who may be more right brain but not nearly recognised for the abilities they do have as much as they are recognised for the left-brain abilities they don’t have.

© Donna Williams

Introspection & External Mentalisation

I use my senses and introspection to “decode” things and sort them out from there, I don’t have pictures in my head sorting things out I have to do the reverse I have to get everything out FIRST by doing, gesture, tone, inference, movement and then go from there.

I struggle to mentalise plans so I just “do” this means that on a unconscious level I sort things out with no conscious thought at the time. When I wrote my first book I just typed and typed and typed with the basic premise being it is a book about my life.

However I am sure there are people in the world who are not on the autism spectrum who can relate this. I have of course  “non-autistic” moments of clarity for me just as there will be “autistic” moments for people off the spectrum.

Paul Isaacs 2016


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“Autism” what does it mean?

Note this is froDad and I Dancingm a personal perspective

When I was diagnosed with autism in 2010 one of the first things that I was told is that was still a “person” even if I didn’t the mechanics and/or “pieces” of my autism that nevertheless was a sage piece of advice that has stayed with me on a personal and professional level.

“Autism” is different for each person so here is a breakdown of the “mechanics”

  • Emotional perception (alexithymia) problems with recognising and verbalising emotional states.
  • Visual perception (visual agnosias) problems with perceiving faces, objects, reading words, colour and “sorting out my visual field into a “whole”.
  • Language processing (receptive aphasia) problems with processing and interpreting “meaning” and “significance” from language.
  • Auditory processing (auditory agnosias) problems with organising the origins of sounds.
  • Body perception (body agnosias and hemiplegia) problems with processing and perception on the right side of my body which affects coordination, problems with recognising pain, hunger and thirst.
  • Body and Movement (visuospatial dysgnosia) left-right disorientation.
  • Light Sensitivity (sensory integration disorder and related learning difficulties) problems with light creating distortions as well as dyslexia and dyscalculia.
  • “self” and “other” processing simultaneous information which requires this can be difficult.
  • Mental health and personality disorders.

 

PERSONALITY TYPES

I have four main personality types which intermingle with each these are human in terms of presentation but will differ form person to person – human beings under stress may develop “disordered” versions of these types affecting social and personal perception, mood management and interpersonal relationships and friendships.

  1. Idiosyncratic
  2. Mercurial
  3. Self-Sacrificing
  4. Serious  

 

NOT RELATING TO “AUTISTIC IDENTITY/IDENTITY-FIRST LANGUAGE 

I do not see my whole being as “autism” nor define myself by it. I see it apart of me, in my case the pieces are emotional perception, visual perception, language perception, auditory perception,
body perception, light sensitivity, information processing and learning difficulties
 with associated mood disorders, exposure anxiety, somatisation disorder, dissociation and personality disorders but they are not a total nor finite definition of my being. I can only speak from my perspective and that is all.

I am “Paul” first with the all the positives and negatives that come with it the likes, dislikes, regrets, dreams and the sense of just “being”. I shall never adhere to the “club” there is to much militancy, over-investing and politics. I see myself as apart of the human race – no more, no less, no more worthy, no less worthy just a person like one of the billions of people on the planet everyone has a story to tell don’t they.  😉

Paul Isaacs 2016


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Bucks Autism Conference Video 2015

Note – These are from personal and obervational perspectives

Sensory Issues in the context of Autism Bucks Autism Conference

This video is about covers these topics

 

Paul Isaacs 2015

 

 

 


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An Accessible Look At My Autism Profile – Part 1

ReceptionThis is a laymen’s terms/accessible version of my autism profile – although I have written previous blogs with technical information about the “mechanics” of my autism here is an “easy read” version of my autism which is broken down into a heading and paragraphs and/or sentences with hyperlinks attached for further information. 

As always this is from a personal perspective.

Alexithymia (Emotional Processing)

Not understanding, processing or receiving my own emotions in “real time” this also affects how I understand bodily messages such as thirst and hunger – Poetry, painting , drawing and music help me process my emotions contextually.

Aphasia (Language Processing)

I have processing delay with language this means I struggle to find words, lose them, find them again and lose them again etc – I live before literal and struggle to find significance in language – however music, bests, rhythm and gesture help me access meaningful language.

Speech Delay (Developmental Milestone)

The developmental milestone of speech was delayed noticeably during my early years (please checkout other blogs for further information).

Language Delay (Developmental Milestone)

The developmental language milestone where delay even when speech was acquired.

Speech Apraxia (Verbal Dyspraxia) (Body Disconnection/Mouth)

I had a disconnect between my body and brain so my brain would have words but my body (mouth, jaws, tongue and lips) didn’t seem to want to “join up” this lead to feeling of heightened frustration to total indifference.

Selective Mutism – (once functional speech was acquired) (Co-Condition

In times of anxiety and/or dissociation I would choose to be mute

Tic Disorder & Globus Pharyngis (Co-condition/Mental Health) – 8 Years old – was called a “Nervous Throat”

This was due to a sensation of something being within my throat this would cause me to throat clear in an abrupt and idiosyncratic (odd) fashion.

Echophenomena (Developmental Milestones – Speech, Movement, Body Language)

  1. Echolalia – Echoing of words (delayed and instant)
  2. Echopraxia Echoing of movements (delayed)
  3. Echomimia Echoing of facial expressions (delayed)
  4. Palilalia Echoing of one’s own words (instant/delayed)

Visual Agnosias (Visual Perceptual Disorders/”Seeing” without meaning and/or “Seeing” but not piecing the “wholes” together)

Semantic Agnosia (Meaning Blindness)

Not retaining what is being seen so I would tap, sniff, lick, rub, mouth and tongue to gain a reality and an experience of my environment.

Simultagnosia (Object Blindness)

Not seeing in wholes – so seeing “fragments” and not seeing the “whole picture”

Prosopagnosia (Face Blindness)

Not processing faces and/or recognising  people by their faces.

Visual – Verbal Agnosia (Comprehension Blindness)

Reading without internalising/retaining meaning

Colour Agnosia

Seeing colours but not processing/understanding or recognising differentiation between them by name (in my case I recognise red but struggle to sometimes name of colours)

Mirror Agnosia (visual processing) 

Not understanding nor processing “other” or “self”  in mirrors for example I would and still get fooled by mirrors and when I was younger used to think that was behind me was in front of me.

Form Agnosia (Visual/Cognitive/Auditory & Contextual) 

Not configuring the “whole”

Pure Auditory Agnosia (Auditory Perception)

Not processing/understanding or the “origins” of sounds and associating them when I next “hear” them.

Language Auditory Agnosia (Meaning Deafness)

A type of aphasia (Language processing disorder).

Tonal Agnosia (Atonia) (Language Processing)

I “hear” tone but sometimes do not associate with meaning.

Pain Agnosia (Body Disconnection) 

I do not process pain at all or there is a significant delay in recognition.

Visualspatial Dysgnosia (Body Blindness)

I do not recognise my body in space so I wear tight clothes, bracelets, tight shoes to get a “reference” of my body.

Finger Agnosia (Digit Blindness)

As a child I had trouble reference that I had fingers and “where they were” this was due to body disconnection.

Paul Isaacs 2015